Thursday, 26 August 2010

Converse much?

Penned by Psych Babbler™ at 8:51 PM
Not sure if anyone else goes through this...but after a day at work, I don't really enjoy much conversation. Blame it on the kind of job I do. Listening to people. I just don't feel like listening to others after 5 pm. I prefer zoning out in front of the computer or TV. Flatmate on the other hand, can be very chatty about inane things. And I politely smile and answer in short sentences. But I'm wondering whether there comes a time when I should tell her my preference --- to not talk! I give subtle hints...like smile, answer and re-focus on the laptop in front of me. But doesn't look like she gets it. Would it be totally rude to just ignore?? =P

Yeah, I know...it would be.

Don't get me wrong...I'm not complaining about her. I just prefer not talking! And she loves to talk and complain about everything.

Oh well, maybe eventually she'll get the hints.

Until next time,

Cheers!!!
Penned under: ,

14 penned views:

  1. Dear PB:

    First off: Thanks for coming by the meanderings and taking time to write your insights. And thanks for the following. I am honoured and glad.

    Now for the post: When you are in one of your chatty moods, you should perhaps start off the topic and without hinting it is her, convey how you feel about having conversations after 5. If she is smart, she will get it. Otherwise . . . I am at a loss. I am one of those who can't say anything directly. I can't even say a firm NO. I can handle only subtleties. Boon or bane, I don't know.

    Joy always,
    Susan

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  2. Everyone has preferences... may be you can casually drop her your preference to her... :)

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  3. This is exactly what I used to tell my mum and she said I was weird :|

    I hate anything more than 'How was your day' for the first hour after reaching home...

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  4. Hmm...try telling her in a way she won't feel offended (not sure what way that is though).

    I am totally like you...I don't like talking too much, especially after a long day. Worst time to get chitty chatty with me is right after I wake up. I hate talking in the morning...I need some time to loosen up before I can get going with the day :)

    :D My roommate and I are totally in tune in these matters. Touchwood.

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  5. may be she doesn't work the way you do and hence has lot to share when she gets back home...it's about nature as well..some people like to discuss what they're going through-good or bad-and some just want to relax-like you...

    can't change her...may be she'll get the hint..but what's the harm in nodding and smiling and let her do the talking ? :) fulfils her need,eh ?

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  6. Welcome Susan! You don't have to thank me for following your blog...I found it quite interesting. Y'know...I'm not very good at saying things directly myself! And she's a good flatmate so I don't want to get her annoyed or anything. Sigh.

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  7. Yeah...the question is how...given that I'm not very good at explaining things that could potentially be uncomfortable.

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  8. Hehe...Ditto. It's different though if I'm talking about my clients...had a flatmate in the past who was also a psychologist and we would discuss a bit of work. But I don't feel like talking just about random stuff on telly and stuff...

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  9. Oh...I don't like talking right after waking up either! But luckily I have about 30-40 mins to myself before flatmate wakes up on weekdays. I need my coffee before I can make any conversation whatsoever! =P I guess the only thing I can do is wait and once she gets used to my routine, she will probably get it?? Get the fact that I'm not big on talking after work...

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  10. Yeah, she doesn't. Her work is more practical and less listening. I guess I should have also mentioned, listening is also draining for me after work. I guess a little is okay...to keep her happy...and hopefully the longer she stays, she'll get the hint that I prefer to not talk too much after work....and like T and her flatmate, we can be in tune!

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  11. Hmmmm... can get quite irritating at times. But hey, it could also just take your mind OFF whatever you've heard during the day ;-) This reminds me of my college days, when there was this girl who used to follow me around the place and try to be friends. I used to get sooooo bugged with her. And when I finally gave up, she and I got along famously and till today, we remain the best of friends ;-)

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  12. I can relate. After the morning madness of getting the kids off to school, I just want to zone out in front of the computer, either browsing or catching up on work...and that's the point at which husband wants to have deep conversations, roams around restlessly getting thru his errands, getting ready...until I want to SCREAM!!!

    Have tried explaining that I really need silence...he gets it...but then feels hurt too and accuses me of not talking to him. I'm all ready to talk after the kids go to bed, and that's when HE wants to zone out :)

    Maybe you could come up with some mysterious 'Hindu' or 'Indian' custom about mental relaxation techniques to be done after reaching home (which can be coupled with watching TV or the comp, wink, wink). Unless she's Indian too, then she won't buy it!!!

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  13. I guess so Pal...I do think sometimes she is trying to be friends...but she has such rigid views about certain things I doubt we'd be able to be friends...but let's see how things go...

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  14. Too bad re you and your husband wanting to zone out at different times. I could try the Indian custom thing...flatmate is not Indian...but she knows I'm not at all Indian either apart from food...so that may not work. =P

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Thanks for your views...I do appreciate them!

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